Thursday, April 16, 2009

Procrastination is the cruelest month

The problem with procrastination, of course, is that -- much like a chocolate bunny -- it can never last. Today I have come to the end of this semester's allowable procrastination and have reached the point where I have to actually start working on the three 20-to-30-page papers that I have to write this semester. Well, I say "have to" although of course one does not "have to" actually do anything; one must simply face the consequences of not doing the thing. In this case I *could* just never write any of the papers, but the consequence would be that I do not graduate (yet?) from law school, and $100,000 later I'm pretty sure I want to just graduate and so I am going to write the papers.

Now there are two important questions to ask about my dread of writing these papers. One is about the writing and one is about the procrastination. First, the writing: why do I so loathe and detest writing law school research papers? I mean, I've procrastinated writing papers all my life, from that 6th grade country report on Switzerland right on through my undergraduate English major analysis of King Lear, but it wasn't because I hated writing them. I just loved procrastinating more. In law school I actually loathe writing the papers. I think it is because they go hand in hand with legal research. Legal research, to me, is only slightly more preferable than stabbing myself in the eye with a toothpick.

As for the second question, that of procrastination itself, I find myself once again wondering not why do I procrastinate (I've sort of given up on that one) but why did I procrastinate so much less when I lived in Korea? It was uncanny how different I was there. I just did things. There seemed to be no reason to wait. Why? What happened to me there that made me behave so forthrightly and productively, and why can't I get that back?

This and more will I ponder as I work on paper # 1: my Supreme Court opinion for Fake Supreme Court class. It is an apparently gorgeous day outside: I can see the sun streaming through my window even though I've been trapped inside here surrounded by stacks of legal crap. Good thing I don't really care for spring. (I'm more into summer and winter; spring is just a bi-polar, half-assed tease.) Then again, if only I did yearn to be outside springing then I could use that as a reward for myself...I will have to think of some other system of rewards. Should I get a reward after every page or every five pages?

1 comment:

Kim Diaz said...

Teeny rewards for 1 page, much bigger rewards for 5.
Motivate, motivate!